When Your Body Whispers: Learning to Hear the Signals Before the Shouting Starts

I used to joke that I was “just a bath girl.”

That my nightly ritual of soaking in a steaming tub—sometimes twice a day—was just self-care or a love of lavender bubbles. But at some point, I started wondering: Why do I need this so badly, and so often?

It wasn’t indulgence. It was survival.

The tub became the only place I could fully exhale. The only space where I could be off, where no one was asking anything of me. And if I was being honest, I didn’t just want to escape into those baths—I needed to. My nervous system was screaming for a reset.

That’s the thing about being high-capacity. We’re capable, competent, and constantly showing up for everyone. But our bodies? They keep the score. And they will speak—softly at first, and then louder—until we listen.

Here are a few signs I’ve learned to recognize in myself (and now spot quickly in others):

• Craving constant quiet (even if you’re not usually a quiet person)

• Over-relying on rituals—like multiple daily baths, long drives alone, or scrolling far past bedtime—just to feel okay

• Becoming irritated by small things, even those you normally love (your kids’ laughter, your partner’s questions, background noise)

• Forgetting simple things constantly, like appointments, words, or why you walked into the room

• Crying easily—or not at all, and wondering where your tears went

None of these mean you’re failing. They mean you’re full.

Your system is overloaded and trying its best to adapt. And if you’re anything like me, you’ve probably pushed through for a long time without pausing to ask: What do I need that I’ve been ignoring?

So let me ask you now, gently: What are your baths?

What are the things you’re clinging to—repeating, reaching for, hiding inside—that might be whispering, “You need to slow down”?

Sometimes we don’t recognize our own warning signs because they’ve become our norms. We chalk it up to being tired. Or hormonal. Or introverted. But what if it’s your body waving a little white flag, asking for a moment of mercy?

This week, I invite you to do two simple things:

1. Pay attention to what you crave when you’re overwhelmed. Not just the habits, but the feeling you’re chasing (quiet, warmth, stillness, solitude).

2. Write down one small way you can offer your nervous system that feeling before you hit the wall.

And if you want a space to talk about this more, I’d love to invite you into the Unburdened™ Facebook group. It’s a soft landing place for women who carry too much. No pressure, no performance—just honest conversation and the slow work of coming back to ourselves.

You're not alone in this. Your body knows. It's time we listen.